So back around Valentines Day we got a list of the kids in Henry's class. I had actually been wanting one for awhile because every time I ask Henry the names of the kids he plays with at school he just says "Mama, they are just my FRIENDS, OkaaaaAY?!?" Kinda like "stop pestering me about the DETAILS WOMAN!"
So I get the class list and I am reading through, and I notice that there is only one name I classify as a girls name on this list. And yet, I know he has 3-4 girls in his class. How peculiar. But whatever, this is an exciting world in which we live, so I assumed the other girls had more gender neutral names, and promptly forgot about the entire thing.
Well, then Henry comes home with his Valentines after their class party. I am flipping through them, trying to
I mean, I don't know any other Chandlers, so it could totally be gender neutral, but I think of Chandler Bing so strongly, that I really thought that the child might be a boy that just digs princess stuff. I mean, that's not uncommon, right? So the other night I was laying with Henry in bed and for some reason the question came to me.
"Baby, is there a kid named Chandler in your class?"
"Is Chandler a boy or a girl?"
"A GIRL!" *followed by a laugh to show what a RIDICULOUS question*
Then he paused for a few minutes, seeming to decide if he wanted to give me a little more information. He must have decided it was time to include me in the loop of his school life because he takes a deep breath and says:
"Chandler is the Mama and I am the Papa. we have a baby named Tots."
Which, was a little surprising. I mean, he is three and everything. Seems like a pretty big commitment... Somehow this announcement took me off guard, so in the mothering moment of the year, all I could think to say was:
"You all named your baby Tots? As in TATER TOTS??"
And he got a little frustrated (as if he has been defending this name choice since they picked it at their 20 week ultrasound) and said "No MAMA. Not like TATER TOTS! It's just TOTS!OkaaaaAY"
And oddly, I felt a little bad, what with my being so unsupportive of his made up baby's name. I remembered all the people we told we were naming the baby Henry if it was a boy and them saying "No really. What are you thinking for a boy's name. Oh. Really Henry??? I LOVE IT!" (Translation: You hate it)
So I immediately tell him I think Tots is a GREAT name. And I really hope him and Girl Chandler are totally happy, because like, I felt we should address his pretend relationship, and I should be supportive or whatever. But on the inside I was already planning on checking out this little Miss Chandler next time I drop him off at school. Gotta make sure she is good enough for MY PRECIOUS BABY.
(frightening over protective mother is already coming out of her shell and he isn't even four yet...he might be doomed)