Friday, February 26, 2010

Nemesis

I was hoping this wouldn't have to be a topic on my blog so soon. Let's be honest, I was hoping this would never have to be a topic on my blog again. Unfortunately, here we are, back on the subject. My endometriosis has been killing me the past couple of weeks. *giant sigh*. I never had a lot of hope about it being gone entirely, but I was sure hoping to avoid the pain and discomfort until I was done nursing. Looks like I am not that lucky.

I just don't get to be normal. Most people don't have periods when breast feeding. I, on the other hand, have been spotting the entire time. Not everyday but a couple of days out of the week usually. Sometimes more, sometimes less. This is even with me on birth control. The doctor said if I went off that things would be worse.

It just sucks. I was just starting to look forward to the days of being done nursing. Of having s little break between Henry and our next baby. Not a long break, but a little time to just be me. Not pregnant or nursing me, just me on my own. And now here I sit cramping and bleeding and unable to even pee without doubling over in pain. Turns out me on my own kinda sucks. The doctors say they can't do anything to help until I stop nursing, which I don't want to do until May. Then we can try different birth controls. Maybe surgery. Or we can talk about pregnancy. So for now, I just deal with it. And complain to you all. Endometriosis sucks.

1 comment:

  1. Endometriosis sure does suck, and I am so sorry to hear it is causing you so much pain again so soon after having Henry!

    I was reading something the other day from a UK based endometriosis association and it was talking about a new drug that works kinda like Lupron but you can take it long term... sounds like hell to me, I have not had a good time with either of the two types of meds they've used to create that pseudo-menopause effect so can't imagine more than a few months of it, but I guess it's a move in the right direction if they are finding some way of hopefully easing the symptoms long-term, even if they are still a long way off a more ideal solution.

    I do so hope that you are as ok as you can be and you get something sorted soon to help... it really does suck and mess up your life (I've just handed in my notice because I can't cope anymore with the symptoms and my workplace's "guilt parade" whenever I'm really ill with it!) I hope you are having plenty of support/compassion from those around you?!

    Take care and know we are thinking of you xx

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