Monday, August 31, 2009


My cat is sick. He is getting older (he is 17) and I just don't know what to do. I don't know when to say it's his time. Most of the time he seems fine, but then he starts throwing up and I look at Nick and ask, "Is he sick enough? Is it time? Am I being cruel keeping him with us? Am I jumping the gun and really he is fine? HOW DO YOU KNOW??"

Nick has no answers for me. Sammie is my cat. Nick tolerates him, but his opinion is not what matters. It is my decision. And I just cannot make it. I promised myself I would never keep him alive just for me. That I would never make him suffer just because I couldn't let him go. Is that what I am doing now? I just don't know. Last night he threw up, and there was blood in it. Blood. Not a lot, but it was definitely blood. That doesn't seem good. Even typing it out makes me feel like you all will say, "IT'S TIME!!!" but then I look at him today and he seems fine. His normal self. Sometimes he acts off. Like he doesn't know where he is. Then other times he is completely his loving self. He throws up all the time, but he still eats and drinks and seems normal. Most of the time.

I just don't know. When I was pregnant he got bad. I just couldn't do it then. Things were so up in the air and I just wanted to wait. He got better...and now he is worse again. I am taking our dog Ellie to the vet for a scratch on her back today, and I thought maybe I should take him too. But really, I know the only reason to take him in at this point is to take him in for the last time. And I cannot do that. Not today. Not by myself. he doesn't seem sick enough for that. But then, how do you know?? I thought I would know on my own, but now I am not so sure. My heart is so sad for him. I don't want it to be time, but I think it's soon.


  1. Oh I'm sorry honey. What does the vet say? You can always call and ask... not sure what else to say. That little black cat slept with me and Holiday many nights...

  2. I am so sorry Sarah that you are having to go through this. Pete and I had to put our 14yr old dog to sleep last year and it was the hardest decision. Like you are going through you just never know when it is really the right time. I think for us it was that he was having more bad days than good days. The good days always gave us hope but there were too few. You have to be at peace with the decision though and I am sure you will get there when it is time. ((((HUGS))))

  3. I have no answers for you either as I've always been out of town when our pets have died/needed put down. (Except the time when I was 12 and my dog got him by a car right in front of me. Yeah. Traumatic.) However, my guess is that you truly will know when it's time because his bad days will start outnumbering his good days.

    My cat is 12 years old and I already dread having to make that decision with her. It's so heartbreaking :(


  4. I'm so sorry you're faced with this. 3 weeks ago we had to make that decision for my dog, my best friend for 11 years. He was my dog - my sweet, sweet boy - but I knew I would never be able to make the decision and DH agreed to do that for me. Every day I wonder if we made the right decision but if I think 'logically' about it I know that he was very sick. I miss him so much, though.

    I think a lot of it comes down to how much kitty is enjoying life. Are the good days outnumbering the bad days? Does he hide at all? A lot of times when animals are in pain they hide. Its an incredibly hard decision to think about - I'm so sorry your kitty is sick.

  5. Actually a matter is that cat loves you so much when you got pregnant and hospitalized she also fell ill.
    what a obedient cat she is!!!

  6. What does the vet say as to why he is throwing up? or why he feels bad? There must be a reason. Old age alone doesn't cause these things. Does the vet know? A healthy older cat could go on for a while yet. 20 years is not uncommon. However, if Sammie is sick, and can't be cured, you'll know when it's time. We have to love them enough not to let them suffer. That's the key in a nutshell. Don't let him suffer. As long as there are more good days than bad, as long as he seems happy, hang in there. You'll know. Unfortunately, you'll know. Been there, done that.