The last two months I was lulled into a false sense of security. My endo has not been bad. I have actually not talked about it because I didn't want to jinx anything, but it has been extremely liveable. And it was awesome! I was having thoughts that maybe I was cured, maybe being off birth control was the unlikely magical answer!
And then this morning happened. And I remembered very quickly how much I hate endometriosis. I actually started a few days ago, about 10 days before I expected to, which is always fun. But it was so odd to be totally taken off guard by my period. My endo has made that impossible for years. So, although no thrilled to start so early, it was nice to almost feel like a normal person. I told Nick last night that I felt great! Totally normal! IT'S AMAZING!
This morning I woke up in so much pain I couldn't stand. I could. not. stand. I literally walked hunched over to the bathroom to take pain medicine and to pray that it eased up before work started. I thought about calling in, but how do I do that? How can I miss work for something that will be happening every few weeks? I decided to take a hot shower and give the medicine time to work. And it has. Not all the way. I am still extremely uncomfortable, but I can stand up. And that is important.
I hate this. But there isn't much else to do about it now. I will see how the next few months go, and then will have to make some decisions. If it stays this bad, or gets worse (like it always seems to do) there will have to be discussions with my doctor. Maybe another lap, I don't know. For now I am just sad to know that I am not cured. That it wasn't magic, it was just biding it's time. Damn endo.