WHY? Do I not have enough to deal with these days? I know how you love to plague teenage girls, but seriously, I am 28! This hardly seems appropriate. I am actually washing my face and yet you still arrive (yes, I know I am typically lazy with washing my face, and yes, I know that is gross...but I can't help it). I hear that you commonly invade peoples foreheads...how kind of you! They can then at least cover you with hair...attempting to avoid people noticing that they under attack. Unfortunately with me you have chose my chin...a low blow acne. A low blow...
Your arch Nemesis,
Dear the Weather Man,
I would like to thank you for the 60-70 degree days. I realize that maybe it is not you that is responsible, but it seems wrong to write a slightly sarcastic letter to God (plus, I might have more important things to say to him...), so I am hoping you will pass along the message. I gotta tell you, you have outdone yourself this time. Our normal weather is in the hundreds right now, and yet I feel like we are in the middle of October. I am not sure I could survive the hot flashes in the 100 degree heat...so I really appreciate the global change!
You biggest fan,
That's right, a letter to the entire country. Do you not realize what an opportunity you are wasting. Everyone was saying what an amazing opening ceremony...the best ever. Then we hear that you had the girl lip sync the national anthem because the real singer wasn't pretty enough to represent your nation! We hear that you are forging documents so that underage athletes can compete! Do you not realize that if you do 99% of things the right way, and then 1% the wrong way, the world will remember the wrong? It's a bummer, but it's true. Just thought someone should tell you...
Hoping to prevent anymore stupid ideas,